NO MORE SUPERBOWL "PARTY PACKS"!

A HIGH-END DRUG AND PROSTITUTION RING THAT SOLD "PARTY PACKS" OF DRUGS AND HOOKERS IS SHUT DOWN! Now they will have to watch the game!

NAKED BURGLARIES!

A MASKED MAN BROKE IN TO A HOUSE AND DEMANDED TO KNOW WHERE THE MONEY WAS WHILE SLAPPING VICITM WITH HIS PENIS! Just weird!

PIRANHA PART 12 - THE CRIME!

A NEW YORK MAN PLEADS GUILTY TO IMPORTED OVER 40,000 PIRANHAS OVER A 2-YEAR PERIOD! This is the scariest one yet!

DON'T MOCK ME!

MAN HITS DISABLED UNCLE IN HEAD WITH TOILET SEAT FOR MOCKING HIM! Everyone has an extra toilet seat for self-defense!

DEION SANDERS FOR THE DEFENSE?

WHEN DEION FOUND OUT THE PRO-BOWL STREAKER DID IT AS A TRIBUTE TO HER PARALYZED COUSIN, HE SAID, "ARREST HER, AND I''LL JUST BAIL HER OUT"! No charges filed!

NAKED SCHOOL TEACHERS!

A MASSACHUSETTS FORESTRY SCHOOL TEACHER ARRESTED WALKING AROUND HIS DRIVEWAY IN A BEANIE AND GOGGLES... ONLY! Exploring nature au natural?

NAKED CRIMES!

A FEMALE IN HER 30'S WAS ARRESTED AFTER SHOOTING A MAN AND WALKING AROUND THE MOBILE HOME PARK NAKED! That's funny! Who would have thought a mobile home park!

NAKED CRIMES - SEX GAMES!

A 16-YEAR-OLD GIRL IS CHARGED WITH 2ND DEGREE MURDER AFTER KILLING HER 43-YEAR-OLD BOYFRIEND DURING SEX GAMES! What was that safe word?

MORE POLICE KINDNESS!

A PASSERBY TOOK A PICTURE OF A POLICE OFFICER GIVING A HOMELESS MAN A PAIR OF BOOTS AND BOTTLE OF WATER! Maybe the world is taking a turn for the better!

DUMB CRIMINALS!

MAN HIDING FROM POLICE POSTS A PICTURE OF HIMSELF ON FACEBOOK, AND IS ARRESTED 45 MINUTES LATER! Stupidity is contagious!

GOOD COPS!

POLICE OFFICER GETS OUT OF HIS CAR TO PLAY CATCH WITH A KID PLAYING ALONE! We need more of this type of community policing!

NAKED CRIMES CONTINUE!

A FLORIDA MAN RUNS OUT OF A SEX SHOP WITH A JENNA JAMESON SEX DOLL UNDER HIS ARM! Is that considered kidnapping?

DUMB CRIMINALS!

A MAN ARRESTED FOR SHOP-LIFTING IS LINKED TO A RESIDENTIAL BURGLARY BY THE HOT DOGS IN HIS BACKPACK! He should have ate the evidence!

NAKED COPS!

GUESTS SHOWED UP AT THE EAST HAMPTON HOME THE WERE STAYING AT TO FIND 2 COPS TRESPASSING AND HAVING SEX! I guess a hotel was too expensive!

NAKED CRIMES - TABLES TURNED!

MAN TRIES TO ROB BEAUTY SALON, ONLY TO HAVE HIS A-- KICKED AND TO BE TURNED IN TO A SEX SLAVE! Not what he expected!

OHIO EXECUTION CRUEL AND UNUSUAL?

OHIO TRIES NEW LETHAL INJECTION COCKTAIL THAT LEAVES MAN GASPING AND SQUIRMING FOR 10 MINUTES! Violence only breeds violence....

BAD PARENTS!

4-YEAR-OLD TODDLER FATALLY SHOOTS HER COUSIN WITH LOADED RIFLE FOUND UNDER THE BED! Ever heard of a gun safe?

1/2 NAKED CRIMES!

PANTS-LESS MAN CRASHES IN TO SCHOOL BUS! 50% clothed, but 100% perv!

DUMB CRIMINALS!

HOMEOWNER COMES HOME TO FIND STRANGE MAN ASLEEP IN HIS HOME! I wonder if he had any porridge?

FIRST ENTRANT IN 2014 PARENT OF THE YEAR!

VIDEO OF INFANT SINGING "SAY BITCH, SAY SUCK MY D---!" GOES VIRAL! As the famous philosopher, Forrest Gump's mom, says, "Stupid is as stupid does!"

NAKED CRIMES RETURN!

AN ARKANSAS WOMAN IS FOUND WALKING DOWN THE ROAD NUDE WITH ANGELS WINGS! They arrested an angel! What is the world coming to?

JUSTIN BIEBER'S HOUSE SEARCHED!

BIEBER'S HOUSE SEARCHED AFTER AN EGG THROWING INCIDENT CAUSING $20,000 IN DAMAGES! Cocaine seized, but no talent found!!!

DON'T TEXT IN A MOVIE THEATER!

A FLORIDA MAN WHO WAS TEXTING HIS DAUGHTER DURING THE PREVIEWS IN A MOVIE THEATER WAS SHOT AND KILLED! That is a pet peeve, but shot?

TWISTED TEENAGERS!

A 16-YEAR-OLD PUNK HITS AN ELDERLY WOMAN IN A FOOLISH GAME OF "KNOCKOUT"! Stupid is as stupid does!

WOMAN PULLS A GUN FROM...

AFTER ARGUING WITH HER BOYFRIEND, A WOMAN PULLS A HANDGUN OUT OF HER VAGINA AND POINTS IT AT HIM! Yes, I said, "Out of her Vajayjay"!

"ATOMIC WEDGIE" LEADS TO MURDER!

AFTER ARGUMENT, SON PULLED FATHER'S UNDERWEAR OVER HIS HEAD IN AN "ATOMIC WEDGIE" LEADIN TO DEATH! Death by "Atomic Wedgie"?

GUN-TOTING GRANDMA!

A GREAT GRANDMOTHER SHOOTS A 16-YEAR-OLD ARMED HOME-INVADER! Careful of them armed grandmas!

BAD GRANDMA!

A TENNESSEE GRANDMA CALLS 911 FOR "ASSISTANCE IN GETTING BEER" AFTER HER GRANDDAUGHTER REFUSED!Police are to protect AND serve, right?

GO BIG, OR GO HOME!

IOWA MAN BLOOD ALCOHOL LEVEL WAS TOO HIGH TO REGISTER AFTER INITIAL 0.467% READING! I guess he chose Go Big!!!

MAN CHOOSES PRISON OVER HOME!

AN ITALIAN MAN CHOSE TO GO TO PRISON RATHER THAN SERVE HOUSE ARREST IN ORDER TO GET AWAY FROM HIS WIFE! Maybe that was the punishment!